Friday, October 11, 2013

Progress.....

In May of 2014, I will be graduating with two majors!! Ha!!! Take that stinky kindergarten teacher that told my mother that I was unable to be in a normative classroom!! Take that school psychologist in Colombia that told my parents that I was not going to be successful in school! And finally, take that to every single person that belittled me just because I have monocular vision and just because I have NF!!!! Boy, that felt AWESOME!!!
Yes, I am very proud of myself, and yes there are still many more years of schooling for me (bah). 
I am near the finish line, and I have just started picking up speed. 
So, my original plans of being 26 and in a master's program got tossed out the window,. A while back, as it turns out I'm just now graduating with a BA in psychology and sociology ( and by the way, majoring in sociology was not in my original plans, it kind of just happened). After I had graduated high school, I saw myself having a successful career and having my own family by age 30,. I have four years to pull that one off! But within that, I thought that I would be in a master's program by my mid-20s... and well I am no t. Lots of things have happened from the moment I graduated high school to now, the present. And I will admit that I was upset at myself for not staying on schedule, but now I am able to see that I had to go through some bumps before being on the road I am currently in.
The thing is that all my life I have always felt that I am in a constant need to prove someone wrong. To prove a teacher, a school peer, a so called 'friend,' a co-worker or even a stranger that just because I may look different does not mean that I am cognitively delayed. For the most part, I would automatically assume that there was always that one person who thought that having my right eye deformed some how meant that I was mentally delayed, so I would always be in fight mode to prove that I was just as capable as everyone else. That was my attitude for the most part when I was in middle and high school, when I graduated and entered college my attitude continued.... and in part that's where I ran into trouble because honestly in college none of that matters!! I had to reevaluate the situation and acknowledge for myself that the only person I was proven wrong was myself; that even though there were individuals who thought very little of me, there was no reason why I should devote my energy to proving them wrong because their opinion on me will never change. Being in college has given me the opportunity to meet some incredible human beings, that build me up each and every day ( why did I not respond to these people K-12?).

For example, just today I was sitting outside of class with a couple classmates, and I decided to share with them my blog, this is what one of my classmates had to say " You are normal, we love you just the way you are." :)  She made me smile and once again forced me realize that the assumptions that others have of me are just that theirs and I have no business getting all worked up over it.
So.... I am 26 and graduating in May with my BA..... and I am perfectly fine with that.