My Choice

I recently had a conversation with a new friend about choosing how to live life in general. We spoke about NF and how we choose to live our lives and how NF affects us. I might not have control over the disease itself, but I do have control over how I live my life. Now I'm not going to lie and say that moping isn't easy because in reality feeling sorry for yourself is a lot easier than waking up each morning with your head held high; but you know what, I choose not to do that to myself. I rather get beaten up time after time and pick myself up than to let myself be consumed by any and all negative emotions. I don't need them and don't want them. Living this way is not easy. Yes, I've had moments in my life in which I've fallen hard and thought I wouldn't be able to pick myself up again, but I have each and every time. And the funny thing is we all get beaten up once in awhile. It's like belly buttons, we all have them.
Several people have asked me how is it that I'm such a happy, smiling person if life has dealt me " shitty cards" as one acquaintance puts it. I always reply by saying that the other option is a lot less pleasing. Despite what others might think or believe I have no reason not to be anything but happy and filled with joy. Other than my NF I am a very healthy person, I have no other medical problems. I am able to work and go to school. I can do anything I set my mind too and be successful at it. I've already proven to many that neurofibromatosis does not by any means own me, I own it!

I don't feel sorry for myself and I don't expect others to either. Why would you? The way I see it I really have nothing wrong with me. So what if I have  monocular vision and some bone abnormalities. So what if I have NF? 

I choose to be positive and optimistic. I choose to believe that I am capable of accomplishing all my goals. I choose to smile and laugh and enjoy life. Why would I want anything but that? I don't understand how we can be our  own best friend but instead choose to be our biggest enemy  I will not take part in that. I vow to enjoy life and not let lives little bumps pull me down.